Letter Bug: My Heart and The Willow
I like to go back and read my poems... especially ones I've forgotten I've written . For a while my poems Blog Letter Bug was something I didn't want anyone too see except the people I showed it to. Its weird, I don't mind people reading my songs, which are poetry but I leave things out of them to make them flow and feel right. But my actual poems they make me feel emotionally naked my hearts not just on my sleeve then its there on my naked wrist for all to see. At least thats how it feels, I know no-one really knows what exactly I'm writing about most of the time. There's always that chance though that someone will be able to read into me and not just the poems I write its kind of scary but a quiet kind of thrilling too.
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
今日は私の誕生日です。------------> (Japanese for Today is my Birthday)
(21 in Arabic)
Today I am 21.... I am now free to drink alcohol, be in bars and sit at the bar, and most importantly I am old enough to get into all shows. Meaning if I want to see a band I can :DI think there are more people excited about my turning the big 2 , 1, then I am. I don't really care. Drinking isn't a big deal to me. If I wanted to drink before I could have its not like america's youth is all that sober. But I like being in control of my body, I enjoy having memories, and I like my moral compass when its pointing north lol.But I'm not against a glass of wine or a beer or two. I want champagne at my wedding :) But today, I'm going to go out with my friends to enjoy a nice cup of coffee and save the celebrating my legal ability to "drink" for another day... I have the rest of my life to see what all the fuss is about, I'm in no rush. Happy Birthday to Me!!!Monday, March 14, 2011
It's Not a Question of Faith, Just Wanting Answers.
Why is it that people doing evil things get to live and continue hurting others while people like my aunt who give from the heart, love, support and touch so many lives for the better have to suffer the painful reality of having Cancer?
I don't question if God loves her, and I don't need a person to answer my question. I know no person could explain to me the answers to this or any other question I have like this, to the depths that feel necessary. I know God is here sitting with me.He sees my pain and is crying with me. I know he's beside her in the ambulance right now holding her hand giving her strength to fight for everyday that's still hers. I have no doubts that his love is more massive for his creation then I can comprehend, and I know that his love covers even the evilest of the evil doers in this world. But when I get to heaven I wonder if he'll have me understand the justice in it all. Because right now I don't see it.
Sunday, March 13, 2011
And for a Moment, It was Oz
Its a bittersweet feeling, not being so emo (lol) I miss the passion I can portrait in my art, and writing. But I like having composure in front of people. I'm not sure I can have them both, I know people can, but can I? I don't know?
It hasn't been a super eventful trip not the way other peoples trips here probably are. I didn't come to be entertained though. I've done a lot of shopping to entertain myself, too much shopping really. And not the kind I can't do at home... boredom and sadness combined = shopping problem for Kate. 200$ dollars nearly gone... not all of it on shopping, i gave some to my mom for things and some of the things were necessary. But thats 100$ a week... and I'm not even spending any on gas. (which is good because gas prices make me a lil sick).
But my brother came in from North Carolina on Friday. That was pretty exciting. And since my mom gets to see him even less she gets to see me, she's pretty into entertaining him. We(My mom, bother, cousin Trace, his friend Even, and I) went to the South side Chicago St.Patty's Day Parade yesterday morning. They Die the River green with some sort of super secret eco-friendly food coloring stuff, the city was pretty much decked in green, and for a moment I could have sworn I was in Oz. I could here in my head that song from Wicked "One short day in the Emerald City."
It was a long day woke up from not really sleeping, around 6am and then we all got ready and went to the train station and rode the Metra into the city. There were so many people on the train that they announced that we would take a little longer to get there because there was a lot of weight on the train lol. Then we walked about 10-12 blocks to stand at Michigan Ave. and Jackson. It wasn't an amazing parade, I'd pick the Detroit Parade over it hands down. Detroit's is more down home and like a big family. That one was this morning I hope Aunt Sally will have corn beef left when I get home, ughhh its SO GOOD! Can you tell I'm an Irish girl ;) Anyways we left it before it was done, it was cold. We got back to the train station and had to wait an hour for the next train. The Metra train station is a bit like a mall there are stores a food court... Anyways the reason thats exciting is because I went into their book store, and I was looking at their Bible section and...
Once we got back on the train I was in a horrible and sleepy mood I needed a NAP (Origin:
before 900; Middle English nappen (v.), nap (noun), Old English hnappian to sleep; cognate with Middle High German napfen), so when I got back to the house I hit the couch hard. I haven't slept that well in I don't know how long.
When I woke up we went to a bar in town for dinner, and then I came home showered and we watched Social Network which was pretty good. I enjoyed it.
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
If I blog for all to see see see
I don't really know what I would do for 30 days?
I've thought maybe I would Post a Poem everyday for 30days
or Make something of some sort everyday (be it by way of painting or baking, making things out of clay etc.)
possibly do something that makes me uncomfortable everyday for 30days... ehh maybe not. lol
If you have any ideas post a comment follow along maybe if you peer pressure me I'll give in... or maybe I won't lol we shall see
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